Now this is interesting. Almost everyone agrees that the best way to reduce or live with one's stutter is by accepting it. This means to accept the fact that you are not able to express yourself in the right time and with the right words. Well, I can accept it. That is not that hard. But am I accepted?

We all seek to be accepted, to be part of a group or team. We hunger to blend with others. If this does not happen then we are affected no matter how strong we are. Some people say they don't care (I was one). That is just something we say to make others not pity you or to make us look strong and content. The truth is it hurts to be outside the circle.

Stutterers are victims of stereotypes. We are seen as, slow, anxious, nervous, insecure, dumb people among other qualifiers. What this means is that we are messed up. People think that we can actually not stutter if we concentrate or speak slow. They say we cannot control the stress and that we are weak. Some may be true but I know a lot of people that have some of these qualities and do not stutter. In fact, who does not have one of the mentioned problems but hey, only 1% of people stutter.

So stutters know the truth. We can have a high self esteem and accept reality. However this is not the root of our pain. It is what others think. And do not bring the bullshit that it does not matter because it does. You mean, stuttering at your in-law's at the table while others mumble making the woman that you love blush and stare down won't affect you. To try to defend your wife from others that are being offensive and start rattling and giving them the power to pulverize your ego while your wife expects some protection and security. Hold on, you are saying that not being able to argue and to ask for things that you do not want just because they are easily to spell out. THIS AFFECTS YOU AND WILL ALWAYS DO. You may control it, learn ways to cope with the pain but I cannot see myself in a future saying "I do not care, That is me" In fact I do not want this. I want to care because I love my wife, and love ones. So when people tell me to accept my stuttering they do not see the whole picture. I accept it but am not accepted. I ease the pain but the pain that I indirectly produce in the ones I care hurts me as well.

I know what I bring to a social group. Stutterers bring tension, guilt, pity. It is inevitable. How do I know? Because I feel that when I meet a stutterer. I just want him to shut up or to not even try to speak. When he stutters I go through the whole pain. If I stutter I get looks and people do not want to talk to me that much and there is nothing I can do. YEAH YEAH, bring me the same BS that we know better, because they are ignorant. Well excuse me but when ignorance is a mainstream having the reason does not do anything for me. When I hear the top scholars and scientists stating that they know little about how to cure stuttering I feel ignorance everywhere.

Having a stutter is horrible because people are not sympathetic. If you see a blind person you do not see people laughing at him "Hey What color is my shirt?" You do not see this because it is cruel. Imagine making fun of a cripple for not being able to go to a PE class. People understand their pain even though they cay see and run, however they do not understand a stutterer.

So whenever I hear someone telling me to accept my stutterer I just want to punch them. "I AM A STUTTERER AND I ACCEPT IT. There you go pal. Now please get out of my face will ya?" There are many things that only stutterers will get so if you can speak fluently give thanks to God. I give thanks to God for me legs and my life and even though I am a stutterer I know I have many good things in my life.