How it all started
My story is very strange because I was not a stutterer when I was a child. I started stuttering when I was 19. It creeped in and stayed in me. Maybe it was because of my problems which I will later get into. If only I could just know exactly why it stayed in me. I do know however, that it was a friend of mine who "transferred" it to me. I know it sounds strange and I know I have no basis but this is true. My friend used to stutter and people teased him a lot. He was just a "mild" stutterer but it was from him that my "subconscious" had the great idea to copy that behavior. Now please do not think that I am making this up. I may be alone in this because I have never talked to anyone about this. If you do not believe me that stuttering can be a learned behavior then why did my close friends who did not stutter at all have started stuttering after they hung out a lot with me? Other people noticed it and actually blamed me making me feel like crap but this is another subject. Why did my wife start stuttering (very mildly)? It is very light though but I do not want her to follow my path. It sounds like nonsense but I am a live witness of this strange issue and do not know if anyone has heard about this. I now live with my wife and my mother-in-law started talking and knowing more about me but she has also started stuttering! Of course I agree that in some cases there are genetics involved in this problem but I doubt this is my case. I think it is all in my head but that does not mean that I am not a "real" stutter because I go through all the PAIN and SHAME that we all stutterers go through. I can perfectly speak fluently alone or when I sing. I speak 80% fluent with people I have opened to about my problem.
I sure feel lost in this whole subject and am extremely curious. . All I know is that, sometimes I feel I can't speak at all and others I feel like I can do it but selecting the right words.
My life has changed. My life is different and I am learning to cope with this "demon". Sometimes I think it is someone else in me but my intellect refuses to believe such nonsense. I wonder if anyone can exactly understand me. I do tell my wife but she tells me I am not that bad. I know she is wrong. I don't have to sound like porky pig to feel, at moments, unhappy. This way I would like to open this blog and hope to find more who have stories to share.
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2 comments:
I have never heard of this before. Stuttering being contagious? Very strange. I've stuttered all my life and most times severely and never had anyone I know pick up my stuttering.
You should send this question to StutterTalk.com. It's a great podcast about stuttering by 3 guys (who stutter) who really know their stuff (they are speech therapists).
Dear Danielle,
I want to clarify this because the other day I had a huge argument about stuttering being contagious. What I meant is that I believe that I fall in the category of having acquired stuttering as a learned behavior. There are three theories on why stuttering occurs and one of these is that some, not many, acquire this. Now, it is just the same as any other case but some stutterers do not think we are that bad but I feel the same frustrations that we all do. I leave you a link with the thories of stuttering. Now I do not claim to hold the truth but my first 19 years I was a normal person. I had never stuttered and do it in spanish 80% more. Maybe I am a rare case.
http://neurology.health-cares.net/stuttering-causes.php
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