It is so difficult to see life as I used to. I am in great pain. My life has changed and I do not know what will happen next. Yesterday (January 13th, 2008), I got a call from Florida. I was resting and my sister-in-law started calling me but in her message I knew something was wrong. She said my father had to talk to me about something very important. I went down the stairs and started wondering what was happening. I knew it was not good. I thought about my brother (who is my son but lives with my parents) but my heart knew it was about my mother. I wasn´t wrong. My father told me that she was not feeling well lately and that she went to the doctor to get some treatment. Then it struck me. My heart was broken and my tears rolled down my face. My mother has cancer.



Leukemia they call it and it has captured my mom. I am so lost now, I love her to death and I am so far away from her. I am her only son and I so want to be at her side but the imperialist, bloodsucking embassy of the U.S in Peru(which has no relation with my feelings to my second country) has built up an unfair case for my not acceptance to the country. See, my parents are legal in the States and have all their papers straight but here in the US embassy they do not recognize the immigration papers. It is so insulting because it makes no sense.



Mom, don´t you leave us. We need you and I know you are a fighter. You are so full of faith that we will beat this terrible enemy. Yesterday when you talked to me on the phone, you asked me for one thing ¨Get close to God son¨ Yeah mom, I am so far from Him now, my faith is weak and I do not pray anymore. But God, why do you let my mom go through this? You know she has suffered way too much and now this? I do not understand You. And she, still clings to You with no doubts and no remorse. Sometimes I just can´t understand Your ways.



Soon we will get news on how strong the cancer is and it is a sickening wait. I posted this to get it out of my chest because crying is not enough. Please have Sonia in your prayers.